Good Morning,

I hope your long weekend was enjoyable, relaxing and days filled with sweet memories of the last long weekend of summer 2009. 

We had a great weekend but on  Sunday I found myself in quite the funk. I really can’t attribute it to anything except I allowed myself to start thinking about the future and when fear began to make it’s way into my mind, my special blend of “crank” reared it’s ugly head.

My poor honey didn’t know what hit him.

As I struggled to work myself out of this funk I realized that I was putting my hopes, my plans in the hands of all things human. Jobs, the recession, family, desires….all things man made. 

My honey and I joke that whenever I start to plan pretty much the opposite happens. It’s true, it is my history. Other then our move to NC very rarely have I honestly wanted to know and follow the Lord’s plan for my life.  I would plan and then asked to be blessed in the process. Please don’t misunderstand me I am not saying planning is unnecessary however too many times I have approached planning as my responsibility first then ask for input after the fact.

Have you ever found yourself in that situation? Barrelling full steam ahead without consulting, talking to, being willing to hear another perspective. Well I know in the past this is how I have treated my relationship with the Lord. Asking, listening, waiting, very rarely entered into my “decision making process”, going to the God of the Universe generally was the last step, and in truth may have been a token gesture. 

Back to my funk, as I began to process all that was swimming around my mind, I was reminded that my Bible had words of relief, encouragement and direction for me. I needed to get out of my own head. And as promised God’s word never comes back without being effective. I’ve added my name to the beginning of the verse, it personalizes it and I can picture my Heavenly Father talking to me. ( Have I mentioned I’m a visual person:)

Psalm 91:14-16 (The Message)

So as my funk came to an end I realized when I have struggled most with fear are the times I have placed my trust in someone or something other than God.

Can I encourage you today, whatever Tuesday brings that inside the pages of your Bible are words that are powerful, personal and offer perspective.

 Journey On,

Good Morning,

Whew, It’s been a very long time since I’ve sat in front of my computer without the sounds of three sets of feet running around. Today I have only one set, and he is actually parked, busy doing something.

Ahhhhhh the little things that bring a smile to this mommy’s face.

The past three weeks have been an emotional roller coaster as we headed home to complete an immigration process that began over two years ago. What we thought was going to be a slam dunk, an easy “administrative formality” took on a life of its own as we carved out a new precedent in immigration.

The details are not important but when we finally made it back to NC late Thursday night, without our luggage (but that’s another story) my honey and I felt like we had been through the ringer for close to three weeks, and we were tired, discouraged and quite frankly numb. 

It’s early Friday morning and my phone rings..okay never a good thing, you know the call where your heart starts pumping faster, and as you answer you are wondering what bad news awaits on the other side. This is where my mind was taking me when my friend anxiously says she has to talk to me but she would have to make it quick as she was at work! Ummmmm, now I’m really nervous. 

Let me back up….

Now I’ve never been a fan of “the puzzle”. Way too many small little detailed pieces waiting for me to sort and place together, so not a Tatum activity but our trip home was much like a puzzle and yet we played very little part in the actual formation of the finished product! Let me explain.

When we were home for our “extended” visit my girlfriends and I had the opportunity to talk to another friend who in our 9 years of friendship would never allow us to talk about faith with her. She was locked up like a vault friends! 

Anyways back to the story, the first Saturday night we were there we went out for a “girls night”. Little did we know that night was going to be a turning point in our girlfriends life. Due to circumstances in her life we were able to share who Jesus was to us, in a very personal and vulnerable way. It was an amazing night, we were thrilled to have had the privilege to chat with her and as I drove back to my parents home that night I said a big “thank you Lord” that He included me that night. It was an answer to a nine year prayer.

Fast forward eight days, I’m still home, again not my plan but the Lord’s. We go out for a second “girls night”. That evening we were able to chat again about faith, about life choices, about Jesus. As I hugged my girlfriend good bye there was no shadow of a doubt that the Lord had His sights set on her and in fact one friend said that to her……….she was being sought after.

Ring, ring it’s Friday morning, my friend who was so anxious on the phone had called to tell me the night we were traveling home was the night our girlfriend acknowledged her need for Jesus, his forgiveness, love , mercy and grace. THRILLING, can I write that again THRILLING!

As I read this verse I was reminded in such an “eternal and tangible” way how our plans our not God’s plans. He is the ultimate puzzle master, He holds all the pieces and on Friday we were humbled to see how one piece fit into another, and if I had had my way I would not have been there to witness God’s unbelievable power.

Isaiah 55:8 

So friends whatever life circumstance is staring you in the face, acknowledge that the “puzzle” that is your life today is being placed together by our Heavenly Father and only He sees the big picture!

Journey On,

Good Morning Everyone!

Well it’s Friday, you know the question that comes next…have you had your sweet treat to celebrate the coming weekend?

I was thinking about a line in a movie that we watched last weekend. The character in the movie, who I think was a bad guy but my detail deficiency is kicking in now said “character is easier kept then regained”. Good line hey?

This is the path my brain took me down. When I allow my emotions to control my responses, you know the ones I’m thinking about. The ugly, selfish, impatient responses that can so easily and quickly come spewing out of ones mouth. Well, after that response has been voiced, the action taken I have just allowed the opportunity for my character to be questioned. Once, twice my not come to anything but over time my chosen missteps, my ill behavior may then begin to break down and tear away at the fibers of my character that is so precious. Just as the line states, making the choice to keep my character is much easier then trying to pick up, dust off and rebuild ones character. I know once trust is broken with another I am not so easily persuaded to begin trusting again. When anger becomes a typical response from someone I know, I begin to retreat.

Please hear me when I say that emotions are a part of life, they are God given. However I can either choose to behave and respond in the moment of my emotion to either maintain my character or diminish it. Thankfully we are loved by a God who gives us limitless opportunities to maintain, rebuild and change our characters.

Don’t you just love the creative ways the Lord uses to remind us of the things that are important. Bad guy gets this girl to thinking! God rocks!

Proverbs 11:6 (The Message)

Journey On

Good Morning,

As I sit at my computer I cannot believe the month of July has come and gone. We have clocked so many kilometers on our van, visited with friends and family and now the reality of the school year is pressing in hard. 

It’s kind of funny to me that my last post was about our evergreen in Canada. Well the Lord has such a unique ways of reminding me that no matter where I am storms come and go but He is never changing. I’ll back up and fill you in.

We returned back to NC with my parents after being away for almost a month. There was an incredible storm that occurred while we are all out of the house. We arrived home to find the storm had blown down two evergreen trees in our backyard. One was cracked and dangling dangerous close to our home. The other evergreen lay flat, on top of our air conditioner, after taking out the eaves trough on the corner of our home. 

My dad had arrived back to the house with my two boys first. They scouted out the damage and then walked around the neighborhood to find many who had experienced true devastation as the back of their homes were seriously compromised. As the events of the day sunk in and night fell, my spirit was no where near being still and calm. The “what ifs”  traveled through my mind with lightening speed. The familiar doubts that Satan loves to thrown into my face about our decision to move arrived right on cue and this mama was not choosing to look for peace.

As the clean up efforts ensued the next day I heard my Heavenly Father’s still small voice remind me that the evergreens in my life, no matter what country I find myself in are under His control. The winds obey Him. If I truly depended on Him, my need to maintain control ultimately demonstrates my lack of faith. Ouch the truth of that stung and yet I was not feeling condemned as I know the heart of my God is instruction and correction.  Perfect timing, God’s timing.

As I gaze into my backyard, the stumps that now sit are a new reminder to me that God is God no matter what country I find myself in. Storms will come and go but He always remains the same.

John 12:27 (The Message)

Journey On

Hey Friends,

This past week we have enjoyed poolside with family and friends. One of the highlights for me was when my honey and I drove past the first home we owned as we began our married life together. We were shocked to see the tiny evergreen tree we loving planted outside our front door now towering above the second story windows. It was very cool. The house is yet to be air conditioned, the bright yellow walls I was so adamant to paint my still lovingly shine on the tiny walls that make up the house. I wondered what the backyard looked like. I was tempted to hop the fence and peer into the garden I bought from a mail order catalog. Life changed, our family was about to expand from two to three when we left our first home.

It got me to thinking driving down the road that marked the beginning of “our life together” how different things are today. Three children later we find our life in a different county, surrounded by holly trees and deer, with few evergreens to be seen.

The gigantic tree that stood proud and sprawling over the tiny front lawn stoically swayed in the wind. It was a wonderful reminder of God’s love for me. The girl who moved into that house years ago had hopes and dreams for the future. My biography of transformation is written with a different story line, one I would have never dreamed up for myself and yet the Author of my story continues to show me that my life circumstances will constantly change, people will continue to enter and exit my life but His love will remain the same. 

Our tree inspired me to continue to embrace change. To allow the branches of my life to grow and extend and on the days where the changes and challenges seem to be too much to bear I can picture my tree and know the source of all growth is holding me steady. 

Psalm 52:8 (The Message)

Journey On

Good Morning,

I am sitting in my favorite chair enjoying a lazy morning. My “to-do” list is running through my head and yet I sit……and am okay with that..for now!

I was recalling a conversation I recently had with my mom in which we were talking about graciousness. I got to wondering what the dictionary has to say about grace. I know what the Bible says but wanted to know how the world recognize grace. I took this from the site, “The Free Dictionary.Com”. 

Idioms: (sayings)

Good Afternoon!

I was out with a friend last night and as we were sipping our delicious drinks I noticed a firefly floating around our table. Fireflies are definitely a southern thing and I love to watch them light up and then slowly fade into the darkening sky. Many a moments have been spent watching these intriguing insects from my porch.

I’m sure there is a scientific reason why they light up and biological reasons why they fade but it got me to thinking about my light.

The Bible says we are to be lights..visible to be seen by all we interact with on a daily basis. I wonder if I was to speak to those who know me well, and those who see me on a regular basis if they see a firefly in me..all lite up. Just as the firefly, I know my light fades and some days depending on how I’m choosing to react in the face of my emotions I know I’ve snuffed my own light out. 

So my question to you is, when do you realize your light has faded?

Luke 11:33 (The Message)

Journey On

Good Afternoon,

In light of Father’s Day being celebrated this weekend and it is Donut Friday a tradition that was started by my dad, it only seems perfect to write about him.

I found this verse and I can hear my dad saying these words to me.

John 15:9 (The Message)

Good Afternoon,

 I read something a while back that stated that God is a God of process. Got me to thinking about process, the advantages and challenges that are inherent in process. The trouble is the way I would “do” process is very different then how the Lord seems to work us through his Heavenly processes.  What I appreciate about the human, man made processes is that there is a definite start and finish. The finish line is seen right from the beginning. In life, goals are decided on, actions taken, road maps and directions are all based on those goals. When the task is begun the deadline is understood. 

Funny how working through the Lords processes of our lives we have very little insight,  generally enough to get us to the next step. The conclusion to the process is often unseen. We move often in darkness. And the Lords timing well, He is never in a hurry so His heavenly clock does not tick neary as fast as I want. Waiting is calculated in human processes and yet in the Lords process’s we ultimately have very little control of timing.   And lastly being detailed deficient, God in his infinite wisdom is kind of picky. He knows what is best for me as his child and will persevere with me until I chose to learn the lesson and graduate from one process and very often move on to the next. The processes we go through are our biography of transformation. It is hard, it is time consuming and detail specific. Through the struggle this is what I know to be true. In my weaknesses, His strength is evident.  In my aversions to a life of transformation He loves me through it and at the end, I have yet another experience in which I can say without a doubt, that my God is faithful..have you experienced that with Him?

Good Morning,

We have been walking around outside looking at the after math of a storm that hit us last night. Thankfully we are all fine, our home is still standing but some of our trees have taken a beating. Our umbrella ended up pretty much in our covered porch which was a sight to see, but all in all no damage was done. 

As I looked at our inside out, upside down umbrella sitting at my door I thought back to Monday where I discovered around 5:00pm that I had been walking around all day with my shirt inside out. Yup, rather embarrassing as we had been to the dentist and then to get a wonderfully sweet treat after the dentist..I know not the best timing but it was HOT!

When I realized my top was inside out I tried to recall how that would have happened. I was not especially rushed that day, however after ironing my shirt I don’t remember looking in the mirror.

How many times do we not want to look into the mirror and see the reflection that is staring back at us. Can anyone relate?

I’m not talking about bad hair days, or those days where those pants just are not fitting the way they use too, I’m talking about intentionally avoiding looking at ones self to examine what is going on with our attitudes.

When we were starting at our umbrella out of its intended environment, it dawned on me that the Lord offers us so many opportunities through the storms of life to shake us up and cause us to think about what indeed is inside out, upside down and out of context. He has clearly outlined for us how we are to behave, treat others and respond to challenges in life and yet often times I ignore those instructions and find myself with self inflicted inside up and upside down attitudes.

Thankfully in those moments when the reflection is less then perfect, my God is willing and able to forgive and help me move past that moment. I am learning that avoiding those reflections dishonors my Father in Heaven as He is always waiting, willing and able to untangle the inside out and upside down twists and turns of the choices I make.

Proverbs 20:27 (The Message)

Journey On